The life vest
On the BIG man it's more like a bib than a vest. I guess if there was an emergency at least my head would be safe? The length never extends past the rib cage. Sometimes I think it should be referred to as the "That flotation device smaller people created so they could laugh at the BIG man because it's actually a secret muffin top maker." These stupid things ought to come with a rip chord that activates a butter dispenser. The life vest to the BIG man is the anti Spanx, instead of hiding everything it accentuates it.