Things BIG men don't understand

Things Big Men Don't Understand: The tree deer stand

One day I woke up and thought, "What's the best way to have a near death experience while trying to take the life of a non expectant four legged animal?" I found my answer: The tree deer stand.

So many things the big man doesn't understand about the tree deer stand. Here's ten questions I would ask before purchasing:

1.  I have to climb the tree to set it up?

2.  I'm sorry, do you know the test weight on that wire holding it to the tree?

3.  Is this sold with a harness and what sizes does that come inl?

4.  If a big man falls in the forest and no one is around to hear him cuss at himself for climbing up in a tree as he falls, is there any photo evidence for his friends he made it all the way to the stand before falling?

5.  So it doesn't come with a built in cooler?

6.  Does the Little Giant ladder company make a stand?

7.  Do you think my scissor lift will spook the deer?

8.  Couldn't I just paint my scissor lift camo and call it a tree stand?

9.  You want me to handle a firearm AND try to climb a tree?

10.  Has no one invented a drone for deer strikes yet!?  What the crap!?

The deer stand makes the big man SMH.

Happy Runners

  Listen.  Regardless of how many times you ask me, I'm never going to give you a happy face.

photo (1)

That's the screen shot of my couch to 5k app.  Every time it asks me, "How do you feel?"

I want to yell at it.  I'd like to spike my phone.  Who is smiling at the end of a run!?  Who!?  Certainly not the big man!  You want to know how I feel after a run?  I feel like this:

weep

 

The only little people I see happy after running are children and adults who don't try.  Back off me with the smiley faces.

 

Things BIG men don't understand

In Flight Refreshments

So you give a BIG man a bag of peanuts and then offer a cup that is a single drink?  A 12oz ginger ale is an appetizer when it comes to refreshments so how can you offer a three oz sip after a bag of salty peanuts?  This is like torture at 36K feet.  Then the BIG man debates on if it's against unspoken flight rules to ask for a refill.  When it comes to air travel, the BIG man is never on the radar.